Dear Abby: My husband has become a social terrorist

Dear Abby: While the saying goes “no man is an island,” I beg to differ, because I am married to one. My husband has no patience with anyone, including family. He was always negative, and as he got older, it got 10 times worse. Over the past 15 years my husband has alienated most of his (our) friends to the point where he no longer has any contact with them. He literally walks away from them in public.

Although I know that many people are very narcissistic today, I feel that you have to put up with some narcissistic things today. I’m not very sociable, but his rudeness got out of control. Our social life is zero. It may be a case of depression (he takes many medications). It exhausts me, and I’m afraid I’ll drown with it. Is there a solution? — Get down too

Dear Go: Since your husband has mental health problems, this should be discussed with a doctor. A different treatment with medication and talk therapy may help if he agrees to it. Please consider consulting someone yourself to help you decide whether or not you want to spend the rest of your life in isolation. Nothing will change if you don’t become proactive.

Dear Abby: I’ve been dating a guy for two and a half years. He is absolute; I’m a widow. We get along well and enjoy many activities together. The problem is his 31-year-old daughter. She is very rude and unkind to me. He tells me it’s not me; She would treat any companion of his this way.

As the holiday approached, I talked to him about our plans. For the past two years, his ex-wife and daughter have taken over most encounters, saying I wasn’t invited to join them for Christmas Eve dinner. I don’t want to be controlling like his ex and his daughter, but I would like us to be part of the plans as a couple.

At this point, he is unable to decide what we will do. He is trying to repair the relationship with his daughter, but I am sure it will not improve until she is ready to accept that her father will have another partner in his life.

I want this relationship to work. We are talking about living together and maybe getting married, but I’m not sure if we should take this into consideration until his situation with his daughter improves. Any advice? — Searching for inclusion in California

Dear Quest: Your friend’s daughter should not be allowed to treat any woman he was seeing in a disrespectful manner. His mistake was ceding his power to someone who was emotionally immature and unwilling to see her father in a happy, healthy relationship.

Give him a deadline to decide how he will spend the holiday. If you don’t have it with you, take a vacation at that time. You are smart to stop living together until this issue is resolved, preferably with input from a licensed mental health professional.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jane Phillips, and founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Call Dear Abby on www.DearAbby.com Or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.